When we first started this series we agreed that we’d cover any topics put to us and that we would cover them honestly, boy am I regretting that with this weeks topic, to say I was a “handful” in my teenage years would be a drastic understatement. Although I am a firm believer in living your life without regrets, embracing the decisions and life choices we make as they help us to grow and learn and become better people, I often look back on my teenage years and which I had done things slightly differently.
My first 2 years of senior school I was a bit of a swot, I loved to read and learn and joined every sporting team, I loved long distance running and ran cross country for my school and the district, I also represented my school for the 1500 and 3000 meters in any events we entered into. I also played hockey and netball for the team for a short while. I had a great group of friends who lived locally to me and we all “hung out” after school and at weekends.
The I hit the third year, year 9, and I discovered boys.. or more to the point they discovered me, or my boobs!! I had a growth spurt which left me “well endowed” in the boob region and although I was more of an athletic build running left my legs toned and muscular and very on show in the short school skirts which we all chose to wear. Now I have painted myself as quite a harlot, I wasn’t, in fact much the opposite, I was actually quite naive when it came to boys and boyfriends and didn’t have my first proper boyfriend until I was 16.
Unfortunately the legs and boobs made me look a lot older than I actually was and meant that I could go out drinking at 15, this is probably the only part of my teenage years that I regret, “clubbing” became the focus of the weekend, which in turn became the focus of the week, we spent all week planning the weekend and which pubs and clubs we’d go to. At the time none of us had jobs so we would drink cheap alcohol whilst getting ready……anyone for a MD20/20, White lightening or Diamond White… BORK!!! We thought we were having fun, getting mortal drunk and making fools of ourselves, we thought we were grown up… I wish I had realised that there would be plenty more years of “nights out” to come.
When we turned 15/16 a few of my friends had left school due to pregnancy, the town I grew up in actually had one of the highest rates of teenage pregnancy in the country at the time. I was still running for the district and In May the year i turned 15 we left school. I actually pulled some alright-ish GCSE’s and shocked my teachers, despite having played truant most of the years 10 & 11. Looking back now I’m not sure what made me play truant from school, I hated the discipline and school bored me, I coolant stand the repetition of going over the same things and only a few teachers in a few subjects could engage me and keep me there, It got to the stage where teachers would simply let me leave class if i wanted too as i was more of a disruption there than when I was away. I’m certainly not proud of the way I behaved in school and without a doubt if I could go back I would do things so differently.
Not only had my results shocked the teachers but my decision to stay on in 6th form and study business studies left them stunned, and I must admit I loved 6th form, I loved the course and the freedom of studying at my own pace.
While in 6th form I took a Saturday job in a new sports store in town, I loved working, I’m a grafter and worked any shifts I could, I loved the money at the end of every month and the sense of pride knowing I had earned it myself. I couldn’t see the woods through the trees and gave up 6th form to take on a full time supervisor roll in my store. I watched all the other “Saturday staff” leave for college or University without regret, I never knew what I wanted to do for a career and couldn’t imagine studying for 5 years for a job I was unsure i’d be happy in. However I did complete my NVQ levels 2 & 3 in customer services and retail management and went on to compete other courses such as “Train the Trainer” I had found a passion for staff training, admin and leadership and quickly worked myself up in the management team.
If I could go back to visit myself as a 13 year old I would tell her that everything WILL work out to be ok, you’ll never change anyone else opinion of yourself and it really doesn’t matter what they think of you… so wear that top if you like it, even if your friends don’t, experiment with your own style, dance to your own music and make each and every day your greatest…. ohh and I’d probably give myself a little shake for thinking I was fat..!!
Please stop by and check out Emma’s heartfelt confession on this topic this week, if you would like to join in with this series or have any topics you’d like to hear us confess to then please get in contact, we’d love to hear from you.
Peace and Love
Michelle (aka Ugly Bug)